I'll Always Be Useless, Won't I? [OPEN]

by **Charm** Wed Apr 28, 2010 10:55 am

[I just got a bit urge to write this scene out. Feel free to join...please? Set the 3rd day of the bushfires.]

Tylar lay on her stomach, sprawled skewed across her bed, biting her nails (a bad habit of hers) worriedly. Her hazel eyes rested on the enervated form of her dragon, cured up just inside the entrance of their weyr. The greenrider was very concerned for Wynnfrith; she'd hardly moved all morning, and radiated melancholy. Tylar knew that the green was upset because she had been forbidden from going out and helping the other riders, for either Threadfighting of trying to keep back the fires. Wynnfrith wanted nothing more than to be useful, to prove that she could still do all that other dragons could, despite her weakness, but now she wasn't allowed to.

And it wasn't just the fact that they'd told her and Finscoth that they couldn't accompany the other dragons. It was that they were right. After seeing how crestfallen her dragon had been about having to stay in the Weyr while everyone else fought Thread, Tylar had convinced M'kael to let Wynnfrith go out once to try and help quench the fires, to give her one chance to see if she could do it. But the smoke had irritated the sickly green's lungs almost immediately, and they'd had no choice but to return to the Caldera, defeated, and Wynnfrith had hardly moved from her spot by the entrance ever since.

She'd gotten another respiratory tract infection from the flames. She'd been sneezing and wheezing since she'd gotten close to the smoke, which was bad, but didn't worry Tylar as much as her disposition. The infection wouldn't kill her, but the greenrider was afraid her dragon had had her spirit broken. She had suffered an unwavering woebegone despondency that didn't look to change soon. Well, Tylar decided that she wasn't going to leave her girl alone anymore. Gathering Cody, her clingy blue dragonet, up with her, she slid off the bed and went to kneel beside her small green, determined to make her feel better.

"Hey, Wyn," she started, giving her green what she hoped was a sweet smile. It may have been more of a grimace, given both of their moods right now, but it was the best she could do. Wynnfrith glanced over to her with pained eyes, swirling in a mixture of yellow and gray. Tylar paled unconsciously at the gray; the last time she'd seen Wynnfrith's eyes they color was when she'd almost betweened as a hatchling. It was pain - Wynnfrith seemed to have broken her spirit. When the green didn't answer her, Tylar leaned against her, and Cody rubbed his head along Wynnfrith's leg, crooning. "Wyn, I know you're upset..."

I'll always be useless, won't I? the green interrupted suddenly, her whisper filled with pain, eyes staring at something very far away. I'll never be able to do my duty to the Weyr. I can't protect anyone. I can't even take care of myself. Her form trembled, and Tylar felt tears pricking at her eyes, sadness and love welling up for the green that hadn't been destined to bond with her in the first place. When she'd first found out that Wynnfrith had chosen Tylar not because of some soul-deep destiny, but because her sister had wanted to get Tylar out of Aria's mind, she'd been devastated. But now she had realized that it didn't matter; they were bonded forever, and they'd grown very close since that fateful day on the Hatching Sands, balancing each other out immensely. And now she loved Wynnfrith more than anything else in the world, and couldn't stand to see her like this.

"Of course you're not useless," the small greenrider protested, wiping her eyes hastily. "Just because you aren't as strong as some dragons-"

As any dragon, Wynnfrith persisted, shaking her head. Even Finscoth's stronger than I am. It's because she's got more will, isn't it? Because she's so determined, and she challenges anyone who calls her weak...I'm not like that, Tylar, I'm not. I can't...stand up to people, I just...

Tylar knew exactly what she meant. Wynnfrith was painfully shy, and hardly ever went head-to-head with anyone. It was true that she hated arguing or fighting as much as she hated anything flamboyant or provocative (like Tylar's dancing, which had drawn them into many disagreements over their days). But what she said wasn't completely true. "Yes, you can, Wyn. Maybe not in the same way as Finscoth, but you can stand up to people. You've always objected to my dancing, remember? We fought over it plenty. And remember when you told Ravana off for slapping me? You have the courage to speak for yourself; you just forget that sometimes."

Maybe, Wynnfrith sighed, but it was clear that she wasn't done yet. But, Tylar...Lisbeth's was right. I am worthless. I'll always be worthless.

"No, Wynnfrith. That's not true. Alicia was wrong, and you know it. Think about it. Size and strength isn't everything. You're gentle and kind and smart...and you're the best thing that's ever happened to me. Never say you aren't worthless. Please."

At this, Wynnfrith did not answer, but Tylar was relieved to see that her eyes brightened some, the gray fading away. Even so, she wished there was someone here to help cheer her dragon up more. She wasn't really great at this soppy stuff. Maybe if Aria or someone were here...